blood to him

cukup lama ga berbagi cerita tentang SI gw, cause too frequent to told.
well, i know belakangan ini SI gw makin parah.
makin ga terkontrol. dan baru hari minggu kemaren gw ngerasa sakaw SI, dan berlanjut sampe next timenya. kenapa harus SI?
cause i want.
ga mau umbar-umbar kata-kata sedih yaa, karna ga penting juga,
just me who can feel it, no one else. so, klwpun gw cerita jg ga bakalan ada yg peduli.
what do you feel when anyone called you bullshit?

...........
klw ditanya masalah gw apa?
dont know, gw jg gtw.
too complicated to told.
but anyway..

happy birthday to someone who called Yesaya Wilander Soemantri; Echa.
too difficult to told. so, i just can give my blood; something which i believe no one gave for him.
NO ONE.
whatever people's said about me; [they called me psycho, lebay, weak, stupid, etc]; just it which i can do for him and from my self.

hmm,
belakangan gw meng-explore SI gw, yg biasanya gw lakukan di tangan, now i do it on my thigh.
more delicious, easier, hidden, and.. spookier, hhahahaha..
luka yg dihasilkan terlihat lebih menyeramkan. so, i like it!

too difficult to spoke up what i feel. well, ofcourse anyone said: "i'll beside you, i'll hear you, .. "
but in fact? ...... that's all bullshit, just only words. ga butuh gw!!
just update, now i have 66 injure. ga 102 lagi. haha, parah jg ya sampe 102,

sometimes i cant tell what i feel, and by SI i can tell anything.
sometimes i feel so disorder, and SI make me calm. i need it when i feel so unloved, when anyone too busy playing with their words.
knp gw baru speak up sekarang disini? karna ya itu tadi ; anyone too busy playing with their words. i'm too tired to hold all.

i just need a hug, to stop my SI.